When you
start looking
at people’s
hearts instead
of their face,
someone usually
calls the police.
So plan to work
fast.
Dammit! Where's My Chocolate?
Advice from a math teacher with a red pen
Tag Archives: dwmc
Happy Finals Week, Bwa Ha Ha Haaaaaa!
If you show a person
how to be a dentist,
they’ll be able to
ruin a life for an hour.
But if you show a person
how to be a math teacher,
they’ll be able to
ruin a life
FOREVER.
Like a Good Little Boy
“It’s messing people up, this social pressure to ‘find your passion’ and ‘know what it is you want to do.’ It’s perfectly fine to just live your moments fully, and marvel as many small and large passions, many small and large purposes enter and leave your life. For many people there is no realization, no bliss to follow, no discovery of your life’s purpose. This isn’t sad, it’s just the way things are. Stop trying to find the forest and just
get back on your knees and finish the job.”
Wish List
I think as you grow older
your Christmas list gets
smaller and the things you
really want for the
holidays can’t be bought.
You’d be surprised
at what a gallon of blood
and a plain white candle
from Pier 1
can do, though.
(I’m not the only one who goes to home improvement stores and imagines that all those suburban housewives are buying fancy candles for secret black magic rituals behind those perfectly-appointed doors next to immaculately-mowed lawns, right?)
You are not
stuck where
you are unless
you decide
to be…
or there’s a
mime in your way.
That shit’s
whack.
Close Some Doors 2
Close some doors.
Not because of pride, incapacity
or arrogance, but
simply because
a mathematician
is outside.”
Close Some Doors 1
Close some doors.
Not because of pride, incapacity
or arrogance, but
simply because
nightmare things with
teeth and knives are
clawing their way in.”
-Ash
Teenager Quiz
Teenager Quiz
Finish this sentence: Dirty socks… (choose all that apply)
- should be stuffed under the mattress like a deranged Laundry Land version of Scrooge McDuck.
- are best when arranged artistically over the toilet during your shower.
- must be hidden at the bottom of your backpack all year in order to develop their natural ‘bouquet du gymnasium.’
- go in the laundry hamper.
I Know What You Fear
(Written by Weasel #1. I’m so proud!)
I am the one hiding under your bed
teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red.
I am your math teacher (sweet dreams.)
Dammit! Where's My Chocolate? 